There was a horrific code green this morning. I heard my pager go off as I sat here at my computer, eating breakfast.

I was there for three hours.

I watched a woman die.

But I am going to go to Flagstaff now and get my dogs. They’ve been there for a week, getting fixed and vaccinated and treated for bunches of diseases. They are going to bankrupt me this month with their vet bills.

And even though I felt awful about the money last night, right now, more than anything, I want my dogs here, healthy, with me, to comfort me. They are worth every penny.

And as cliched as it sounds, as I watched a man come in the ER to identify the body on the gurney, under the white sheet, and as he began to sob, I actually deeply felt for the first time, that, while money matters, it simultaneously doesn’t. It’s a conflicting feeling. I’m sortof glad I have four hours in the car today to think it over.

I want my dogs back.